2014 was the warm-up, 2015 is the take-over! Looking back, a year a go a lot has happened and a lot has changed. Looking back, funny how I am so aware of the change that is happening in my life but I have yet to determine whether is was for the good or for the worst. I first noticed the change, after I challenged myself to engage on a summer job and summer class at the same time. I pulled such stunt because I want to see if I can be a superwoman--how I badly want to become one, the queen of multitasking. And that absurd thought and drastic actions took me to unreachable heights both high and low. I thought I was invincible, I thought I was at the top of my game-- but no, I was doing the exact opposite. And little by little, I was gong downhill. And that transition somewhat frightened me, I was afraid because I felt like I am drifting away from my life goals and I feel like I am destroying myself. I was physically, mentally and emotionally drained. And honestly, I did not know what to do anymore. I felt lost and I felt desperate and hopeless. My mind was so clouded that I just decided to wherever the wind blows and I suddenly do not know what to do with my life anymore. My nightly meditations, warm-baths and yoga sessions does not work for me anymore, heck even the inspirational blogs and books cannot penetrate through myself anymore. In a word, I became dense and soul-less. I was becoming unhuman, and guess I should be happy with it because finally after years of trying to be robotic with all kinds of human emotions, I finally succeeded being a cold-hearted person. But know what? I felt empty. Suddenly, I felt useless and meaningless--- all the titles and recognitions did not seem to elate me anymore because I was unhappy. Despite of anything, I just did not see myself becoming better as days go by.
But two days have already passed, a sign that it is indeed a new year--which for me says that it is another chance being given to us to correct our mistakes and become the best that we can be. I hate to think that it is too late for me now to start anew because I know just like any sinners in this world, I have the chance to take my life and just make the most of it. But first, I have to find myself. If anything, 2015 will be all about finding myself and loving it whole heartily. My dear readers, if I have to share another of my life's guiding principle that would be: Know who you are and love every single bit of it. I believe that love starts within. If we love ourselves, even our imperfections and respect ourselves enough to be rational in all our decisions, that kind of genuine will emanate from us thus allowing us to love the people around us and appreciate their existence in our lives. And so, I will fearlessly embark upon thee journey of my chi and when I am finally home to myself, I know that all past wounds and all hatreds in my soul will vanish magically. :)
On a positive note though, I will just share all my plans this 2015 and the habit I will try to develop that will last a lifetime. I am so excited for this year because I can feel it, all my heart's desire will slowly come to life :) Anyway, here are my plans:
1. I will have a major blog make-over soon!
2. A major change in my diet as I try to challenge myself to live healthy and green this year!
3. I will be doing something huge for my career plans and I will let you know when I see myself on magazine covers and marquees. LOL!
4. Fitness will now be my main priorities :)
5. By november, I will do something out of my comfort zone..you will know soon :)
6. I will continue reading books. Of course!
7. This is it for now, and I will just come back soon for updates :)))))
Remember my dear readers, do not ever give up on change. Welcome them in your lives but make sure you know which change are worth keeping. And if you must change, start with your soul; cleanse your heart and pray :) Have a wonderful New Year ahead:)